Free yourself of conflicts BY SUMA VARUGHESE Suma Varughese is the Editor-in-Chief of Life Positive magazine

One of the great ideals of human existence is to be able to live in a state of harmony with oneself, others and the universe at large. But alas, almost from the time we are born, we are plunged into a never-ending struggle within ourselves and between us and a hostile world to get what we want. Our own inner lives are governed by the chaos of conflicting desires and needs. We want wealth but we also want not to feel guilty because others don’t have it. We want to eat delicious food but we don’t want to put on weight. As for the outside world, it often seems as if conflict is the only way to relate to others. We get into a bus and find ourselves pulled and pushed by those getting in behind us; we like to sleep with the windows open but the spouse wants it closed. Everybody has an agenda and that is often in conflict with the agenda of others. We all long for people to change and become the way we want them to be. Alas, this longing for the world to change is one of Madame Maya’s favourite tricks. For the world is not going to change. It is waiting for you to change! And wisdom says that you had better had. Spiritual maturity is won the minute you realize that it us up to you to adapt to the world and not wait for the world to adapt to you. Other people have as much right to stampede into a bus as you do. Your spouse has the right to a closed window just as much as you have the right to an open one. Accepting that others has as much right to be themselves as you do is the first step to conflict-free living. The other is to actively prefer the welfare of others over your own. When we are deeply and strongly moved to serve the welfare of the world rather than our own, we will reach a conflict-free state. Your friend wants you to collect a book for him from a remote bookshop. Great, you shout, what an opportunity to serve him. Your colleague gets a promotion over you. You rejoice because his happiness is more important than yours. When we live in this sort of state, everything everyone does is an opportunity for growth or to serve and therefore something positive. How then can there be conflict if you and the world are swimming in the same direction?  BY SUMA VARUGHESE

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