Remember, its got Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sly Stallone, Brandon Routh, and Akshay Kumar?

The Kambakkht Ishq bikini babes Kareena Kapoor, Denise Richards, and Amrita Arora are supposed to be extremely stylish supermodels in the movie.

Denise Richards bikini photo

Aki Narula will design Kareena’ clothes, Shabina Khan will design Denise Richards’ outfits, while Ashley Rebello will style Amrita Arora’s clothes, reports say.

Kareena Kapoor in a bikini in Tashan

Kareena Kapoor is said to be doing an underwater bikini scene in Kambakkht Ishq. There was a lot of brouhaha when she wore a bikini in Tashan, which is now being repeated with Kambakkht Ishq.

But this time, Kareena will be a little more curvaceous. Apparently, she has been asked to put on weight, so she will not look rail thin as she did in Tashan.

Amrita Arora bikini photo from Kambakkht Ishq

And what Kareena does, her bosom buddy Amrita Arora does too. She says she has worked hard on a bikini body, but from her pictures she does not look cadaverous or starved, which is a relief.

I suspect Kambakkht Ishq is peppered with bikinis to make up for the lack of a storyline. The movie peddles the done-to-death battle of the sexes.

Kambakkht Ishq is about an Indian stuntman (Akshay Kumar) and a supermodel (Kareena Kapoor), who hate each others guts. He is a casanova and she is a prim little miss who thinks that men are only interested in sex.

A look at the promo is enough to convince me that this movie will be a complete waste of the tons of money poured into it.

The movie is supposed to be funny but if the lines in the promo are anything to go by, Kambakkht Ishq is going to be boring as hell.

Sample this. “What do you know about stuntmen, huh?” our hero asks. “Second-hand people with second-hand lives,” she retorts. If this the level of their banter, I will gladly give the movie a miss.

Photo: Akshay Kumar and Kareena Kapoor cross swords in Kambakkht Ishq

And, what’s with the sword-fighting scene, a direct copy of the absolutely sensuous scene from Joddha Akbar? It makes no sense whatsoever.

Photo: Hrithik Roshan and Aishwarya Rai Bachchan in Jodhaa Akbar

The tag lines of Kambakkht Ishq in the promo, say Hollywood Meets Bollywood, and A Perfect Love Story…..That Wasn’t.

My problem is why on earth did the bickering duo have to be in Hollywood? He can be a stuntman here, she can be a supermodel here; why drag in a poor Sylvester Stallone who looks as though he has no clue why he is there?

The only funny line in the promo- albeit unintentionally – is Sylvester Stallone ferociously nodding his head and spitting out “Kambakkht Ishq.”

But since the movie insists on being a mating between Bollywood and Hollywood, it has been shot entirely in Los Angeles, California, and Universal Studios.

The promo of Kambakkht Ishq was revealed during the screening of Aa Dekhen Zara, which released on March 27, 2009.

Kambakkht Ishq has been produced by Sajid Nadiadwala and helmed by first-time director Sabbir Khan. The script has been written by Sabbir Khan and Ishita Moitra.

Sabbir Khan was the Assistant Director in hits like Maine Pyar Kyun Kiya? and Mujhse Shaadi Karogi.

Akshay Kumar’s last movie Chandni Chowk to China was his biggest flop after nearly seven back-to-back hits, the last one being the blockbuster Singh is Kinng.

He will be seen next in Nagesh Kukunoor’s Tasveer 8×10 and Blue.

Arnold Schwarzenegger  may be passed over for the role of Conan the Barbarian in the proposed remake of the movie that launched him into superstardom, but Bollywood is all set to receive the California governor with open arms.

Giving Schwarzenegger company will be Rocky star Sylvester Stallone in Kambhakt Ishq (Incredible love).

And if rumors are to be believed, Beyonce Knowles might shake a leg or two to Bollywood “item songs.” in the movie. For the uninitiated, items songs in Bollywood refer to sexy, booty-shaking song-and-dance sequences in the middle of a movie, that usually have nothing whatsoever to do with the storyline. More often than not, they are dream sequences.

Bollywood, a not-so-poor cousin of Hollywood, is based in Mumbai, India that produces the highest number of movies in the world, to the tune of nearly 900 movies every year. Big-budget movies are par for the course for Bollywood, but Incredible Love will be the first Indian production that will be shot at Universal studios at a budget over £11 million.

Though the title sounds extremely seedy, two of Bollywood’s A-listers will also star in the movie: superstars Akshay Kumar and Kareena Kapoor. So no, nothing to worry for Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone – the worst would be that the movie would bomb abroad and run well in India, and they may provide those who are used to nothing but Hollywood a lot of merriment.

Akshay Kumar, who is known for doing his own incredibly risky stunts in Bollywood movies, will play a highly successful Indian stuntsman (Akshay Kumar) in Hollywood who apparently has all but true love. Where exactly do Stallone, Schwarzenegger and Beyonce fit, I have no clue. Probably they are other stuntmen who beat up Akshay Kumar often. Maybe, Akshay Kumar would be a lower rung stuntman who actually is tougher than Stallone and Arnie, but gets thrashed by them regularly in their Hollywood roles. Perhaps only Kareena kapoor would, incredibly so, understand his pain.

Maybe its a whodunnit about who loves who incredibly.

Bollywood is ingenuous, if nothing.

Incredible Love will be produced by Sajid Nadiadwala who sees the movie as a “exciting merging of Hollywood and Bollywood.” I don’t know about you but it sounds extremely ominous to me. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely adore Bollywood movies – most of the time. But mainstream Bollywood – Hollywood mergers, as Nadiadwala calls it, usually make asses of bewildered foreign actors who seem to have wandered into lalaland. Take Samantha Fox in a little known movie called Rock Dancer. (She seemed to be in a fugue through the movie, but was a huge hit. No need to explain why. Indian men prefer their women to be on the voluptuous side.)

Worse Bollywood films play, shockingly, to stereotypes. Foreign women are usually potrayed as loose women who drink, smoke, and are ready to jump anyone’s bones given half a chance, as opposed to sickeningly virtuous Indian women, except for a few exceptions like Elizabeth Russell (Rachel Shelley) in Lagaan who is compassionate and helps poor villagers take on her tyrannical brother Captain Russell (Paul Blackthorne).

In Bollywood, the men don’t fare very well either. So, if we go by precedent, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone may just be the bad boys in Incredible Love.